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Funny Facebook Statuses and Funny Twitter Statuses

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Status Crap is posting other people’s funny, stupid and ridiculous facebook and twitter status updates. Then he’s going to pinch off a turd after lunch. Just copy and paste them from facebook, twitter, etc. It's too much fun!
Todd Not sure if there's an award for "hottest woman seen eating Chicken McNuggets on a train," but I think I have a nominee.
2010-08-10 - Funny Facebook Statuses - Comments(0)
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robdelaney Just saw a cute little boy eating a HUGE cookie! I taught him a lesson about loss that I know he'll appreciate one day.
2010-08-10 - Funny Twitter Statuses - Comments(0)
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Paul I was going 2 punch an elephant in the face & then I remembered, they never forget. So I punched an old person, they forget everything.
2010-08-10 - Funny Facebook Statuses - Comments(0)
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JudahWorldChamp Sharks are jealous of me because I make love to mermaids in front of them.
2010-08-10 - Funny Twitter Statuses - Comments(0)
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BorowitzReport The Teen Choice Awards confirm my belief that teens should not be given a choice.
2010-08-09 - Funny Twitter Statuses - Comments(1)
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Rob Just got fired from SuperCuts for suggesting we change our name to 'Shut the Fuck up. You're at the Mall. What did you Expect?''
2010-08-09 - Funny Facebook Statuses - Comments(0)
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MoRocca Walking down Carrera 7 in Bogota. Just passed Hooters. Shouldn't it be spelled Jooters?
2010-08-09 - Funny Twitter Statuses - Comments(0)
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Paul Whenever I'm at a crossroads, I ask myself, "What Would Wesley Snipes do?" Then I buy a gun and don't pay my taxes.
2010-08-09 - Funny Facebook Statuses - Comments(0)
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capricecrane Whenever I see a guy in jean shorts I feel sad that he has nobody in his life to say, "You really shouldn't wear those."
2010-08-09 - Funny Twitter Statuses - Comments(0)
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Brian Does anyone else not take the sport "skeet shooting" seriously?
2010-08-09 - Funny Facebook Statuses - Comments(0)
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Tom Wait, if NSFW is taken, how do I abbreviate "Nuts Shaved For Weekend?"
2010-08-07 - Funny Facebook Statuses - Comments(0)
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sniffyjenkins Paul the octopus said I'd go to the beach instead of work & I wouldn't get fired. My prediction? Paul will be my lunch once I get a new job.
2010-08-07 - Funny Twitter Statuses - Comments(0)
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Seth Favre retiring for third time. Only 2 more until the apocalypse.
2010-08-06 - Funny Facebook Statuses - Comments(0)
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